Some books give you interesting ideas.
Others give you a framework that stays with you for decades.
Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher, William Ury and Bruce Patton belongs firmly in the second category.
First published in 1981 and developed from work associated with the Harvard Negotiation Project, the book fundamentally challenged the traditional idea that good negotiation means being tougher, more aggressive or better at forcing concessions from the other side. Its alternative, principled negotiation, focuses on separating people from problems, understanding interests rather than arguing over positions, creating options for mutual gain and using objective criteria.
For small-to-medium business owners and leaders, I believe the book is particularly valuable because negotiation is not something you occasionally do. It is something you are doing almost continuously.
You negotiate prices with customers.
Terms with suppliers.
Salaries with employees.
Finance with banks.
Rent with landlords.
Expectations with executives.
Arrangements with shareholders and family members.
Strategic alliances.
Acquisitions.
Business sales.
Earn-outs.
Partnerships.
And sometimes you are negotiating the future of the business itself.
Throughout almost four decades of big corporate, being a start-up entrepreneur, and advising businesses across Australia and internationally, I have been involved in negotiations ranging from everyday commercial matters through to acquisitions, joint ventures, capital raising, strategic alliances, shareholder arrangements and complex multi-party projects.
I have also studied negotiation formally. When I completed my Executive MBA at the University of Western Australia, with Distinction, I received the Dux Award for Strategic Negotiation.
Yet some of my most valuable negotiation lessons did not come from a classroom.
They came from sitting across tables where significant amounts of money, careers, ownership, control and sometimes years of work were at stake.
And one lesson stands above many others:
The best negotiator is not necessarily the person who extracts the biggest concession.
The best negotiator is often the person who understands what really matters, understands what matters to the other side, creates alternatives, protects the relationship where appropriate, knows what they will not compromise and, critically, knows when to walk away.
That is why Getting to Yes remains so relevant.
Why Getting to Yes Still Matters to SME Owners & Leaders (Business Advisor Perth)
Many people approach negotiation as though there are only two choices.
Be hard.
Demand more, concede less, apply pressure and try to win.
Or be soft.
Preserve the relationship, compromise, accommodate and try to reach agreement.
Getting to Yes offers a third approach.
Be hard on the problem, without necessarily being hard on the people.
The authors call this principled negotiation, sometimes described as negotiation on the merits. Harvard’s Program on Negotiation continues to identify its four core elements as separating people from the problem, focusing on interests rather than positions, inventing options for mutual gain and insisting on objective criteria.
That distinction is particularly important in an SME.
Why?
Because many SME negotiations involve relationships that continue after the negotiation.
You still need the supplier tomorrow.
Your employee still needs to lead the team.
Your landlord still owns the building.
Your shareholder still owns part of the company.
Your customer may represent 20% of your revenue.
Your brother or sister may still sit beside you at the family Christmas table.
So there is an important commercial lesson here:
Winning the negotiation while destroying the relationship may be a very poor business outcome.
The Problem With Positional Bargaining (Strategic Planning Perth)
Imagine a supplier says:
“We need a 12% price increase.”
The customer responds:
“We will accept no more than 3%.”
The negotiation immediately becomes positional.
12%.
3%.
10%.
4%.
8%.
5%.
Eventually perhaps they settle at 6.5%.
Both parties may walk away believing they negotiated successfully.
But was 6.5% actually the best solution?
Perhaps the supplier’s real problem was labour costs.
Perhaps the customer’s real concern was protecting gross margin.
Once those underlying interests are understood, entirely different possibilities become available.
A longer contract.
Volume commitments.
Changed payment terms.
Reduced delivery frequency.
Alternative specifications.
Shared forecasting.
Different service levels.
Product substitution.
An indexed pricing mechanism.
Suddenly the problem is no longer:
12% versus 3%.
It becomes:
How can we structure an arrangement that addresses the most important interests of both businesses?
That is a fundamentally more strategic question.
Separate the People From the Problem (Leadership Development Perth)
This is one of the simplest principles in Getting to Yes.
It is also one of the hardest to practise.
Negotiations involve human beings.
And human beings bring ego, fear, pride, history, emotion, status, pressure and personal interpretation into the room.
A commercial disagreement can therefore become personal remarkably quickly.
“Your valuation is unrealistic.”
can be heard as:
“The business you spent 30 years building isn’t worth much.”
“We need stronger reporting requirements.”
can become:
“You don’t trust me.”
“We can’t accept your price.”
can become:
“You don’t value what we do.”
Once this happens, the parties may stop solving the commercial problem and start defending themselves.
This is where negotiation and leadership intersect.
A capable leader needs sufficient emotional intelligence and self-awareness to recognise when emotion is beginning to drive the negotiation.
The Harvard Program on Negotiation similarly emphasises dealing directly with the “people problem”, including perceptions and emotions, rather than attempting to solve relationship problems simply by making substantive concessions.
Be Tough on the Issue, Not the Individual (Executive Leadership Perth)
Some of the strongest negotiators I have encountered have been remarkably calm.
They do not need theatrical aggression.
They ask questions.
They listen.
They clarify.
They challenge assumptions.
They tolerate silence.
And they keep returning the discussion to the problem.
This becomes particularly important when dealing with business conflict, because attacking the person frequently makes solving the problem harder.
Focus on Interests, Not Positions (Business Advisor Perth)
For me, this is one of the most important ideas in the entire book.
A position is what somebody says they want.
An interest is why they want it.
Consider somebody selling their business.
Their position might be:
“I want $10 million.”
But what lies underneath that number?
Financial security?
Recognition for 30 years of work?
Enough capital to retire?
Protecting employees?
Keeping the family name?
Receiving most of the consideration upfront?
Continuing to work in the business?
Avoiding an earn-out?
Preserving a legacy?
Or perhaps $10 million simply represents, emotionally, what the owner believes their life’s work ought to be worth.
Those are completely different interests.
And they create completely different negotiating possibilities.
What Negotiating With GlobalCo Taught Me About Interests (Fractional CEO Perth)
One of the more consequential negotiations of my career arose when I was approached by GlobalCo ( pseudonym) , then one of the world’s largest asset-management groups, to establish my own investment-management company in strategic alliance with them.
The negotiations were lengthy and complex.
Ultimately, I secured an exclusive five-year arrangement involving a substantial retainer running into the tens of millions.
Looking back, what strikes me is how closely that experience reflected the principle at the heart of Getting to Yes.
The negotiation was never simply:
“How much will you pay?”
There were broader strategic interests.
GlobalCo wanted credible local capability, distribution and access to a market opportunity.
I wanted sufficient backing, strategic credibility, exclusivity and the ability to establish a serious investment-management business rather than simply becoming another distributor.
Both parties needed to understand what the other was actually trying to achieve.
Had we reduced the entire negotiation to one headline financial number, much of the potential value could have disappeared.
That is a lesson I would encourage every SME owner to remember.
Before arguing about what somebody wants, understand why they want it.
Invent Options for Mutual Gain (Business Growth Perth)
Traditional bargaining often assumes a fixed pie.
If I get more, you must get less.
Sometimes that is true.
Often it isn’t.
Getting to Yes encourages negotiators to create alternatives before deciding how value should be divided. Subsequent negotiation research and practice have continued to develop this integrative approach, including preparing multiple packages that reveal differences in what each side values.
Consider an employee asking for another $20,000.
Perhaps the business cannot justify it.
But what does the employee actually value?
More flexibility?
Additional leave?
Professional development?
Performance incentives?
Career progression?
Equity?
Different responsibilities?
The employee may place high value on something that costs the employer considerably less than $20,000.
That creates value rather than merely dividing it.
A Simple Negotiation Framework (Strategic Planning Perth)
POSITION
What does each party say it wants?
↓
INTERESTS
Why does each party want it?
↓
OPTIONS
How else could those interests be satisfied?
↓
OBJECTIVE CRITERIA
How can we independently assess fairness?
↓
BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement)
What will each party do without an agreement?
↓
AGREEMENT
Is the proposed deal better than the realistic alternatives?
Insist on Objective Criteria (Governance & Boards)
Another powerful principle is moving away from:
“I think this.”
versus:
“Well, I think that.”
and towards independent standards.
These might include:
market value, industry benchmarks, comparable transactions, professional standards, expert valuations, legislation, precedent or independently verifiable cost information.
Harvard’s Program on Negotiation continues to recommend objective criteria precisely because they can move negotiations away from competing assertions and towards standards both parties can regard as legitimate.
I find this particularly useful in business valuation.
Instead of:
“My company is worth $10 million.”
the questions become:
What is maintainable EBITDA?
What multiple is appropriate?
What do comparable transactions indicate?
What is normal working capital?
How should debt be treated?
How sustainable are earnings?
How concentrated are customers?
What risks should affect valuation?
That is a far more disciplined discussion.
And it is another example of why strong business governance matters. Important decisions should be based on evidence and appropriate criteria, not simply personality or negotiating strength.
BATNA, Perhaps the Most Valuable Concept in the Book (Strategic Planning Perth)
If an SME owner remembers only one acronym from Getting to Yes, I would make it:
BATNA.
Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement.
Put simply:
What will you do if this deal does not happen?
The authors introduced BATNA as the benchmark against which a proposed agreement should be evaluated, and contemporary negotiation scholarship continues to regard it as fundamental to bargaining power and disciplined decision-making.
Suppose your largest customer demands a 15% price reduction.
If losing them could threaten your business, you have a weak BATNA.
Now suppose you have three credible prospective customers capable of replacing the revenue.
The negotiation has changed dramatically.
Nothing changed at the negotiating table.
Everything changed outside it.
That is a profound strategic lesson.
Negotiating Power Is Often Created Before You Enter the Room (Strategic Planning Perth)
This is where I would extend the book’s thinking for SME owners.
People often assume negotiating ability is demonstrated inside the meeting.
I think much negotiating power is created months or even years earlier.
A business dependent on:
one customer,
one supplier,
one financier,
one key employee,
one distribution channel,
or one prospective buyer
has created structural negotiating weakness.
That is not primarily a negotiation problem.
It is a strategy problem.
Develop alternative customers.
Develop alternative suppliers.
Maintain relationships with more than one financier.
Develop management depth.
Build multiple routes to market.
Talk to more than one prospective acquirer.
This is one reason strategic planning should consider dependency and optionality.
More credible alternatives
↓
Less dependency
↓
Greater choice
↓
Stronger BATNA
↓
Greater negotiating power
↓
Greater willingness to walk away
That is strategy and negotiation working together.
Never Confuse Wanting the Deal With Needing the Deal (Business Advisor Perth)
I have learned this lesson repeatedly.
Wanting an agreement is fine.
Needing one is dangerous.
Once significant management time, legal fees, due diligence, emotion and reputation have been invested in a transaction, an extraordinary psychological pressure develops to complete it.
You start thinking:
We have come too far to walk away now.
That is dangerous thinking.
The time and money already spent are sunk costs.
They do not transform tomorrow’s bad transaction into a good one.
Research and negotiation guidance describe a related problem as the agreement trap, where the desire to reach agreement causes negotiators to underweight whether the deal is actually superior to their BATNA.
Sometimes one of the strongest things you can say in business is:
No.
What Four Acquisitions Taught Me About Walking Away (Business Growth Perth)
Later in my career, I became heavily involved in acquisition-led growth.
That meant identifying suitable businesses, approaching owners, conducting negotiations that sometimes extended for as long as eighteen months, agreeing commercial terms, briefing lawyers, undertaking detailed due diligence and then dealing with post-transaction requirements.
We ultimately completed four acquisitions and several joint ventures.
Those experiences reinforced something Getting to Yes articulates exceptionally well.
Time invested in a transaction is not a reason to complete it.
After twelve or eighteen months, you become invested in the outcome.
You know the seller.
The lawyers are involved.
Management has spent hundreds of hours on it.
Everybody wants closure.
That is exactly when you need discipline.
Ask:
If this transaction appeared on my desk today, on these terms, knowing what I now know, would I still do it?
If the answer is no, another six months of negotiation will not make the previous eighteen months recoverable.
For SME owners considering acquisitions, this is one reason I strongly advocate rigorous business acquisition analysis.
Complex Negotiations Rarely Have Only Two Parties (Business Advisor Perth)
Another limitation of thinking about negotiation simply as “buyer versus seller” is that real business situations often involve numerous stakeholders.
I learned this particularly clearly through the development of Kenton Eco Estate.
My business partner and I were involved from the project’s conception through approvals, infrastructure, financing, development, marketing and sales.
That required extensive and complex negotiations with government, the Water Board, infrastructure parties and other stakeholders. It also involved a lengthy Supreme Court challenge from an environmental group.
Among the outcomes was the development of a reverse-osmosis desalination facility associated with providing fresh running water to approximately 1,750 existing households in the area.
A project like that teaches you quickly that successful negotiation cannot simply mean:
“How do we beat the other side?”
There may be many “other sides”.
Government has interests.
The bank has interests.
The community has interests.
Environmental groups have interests.
Contractors have interests.
Customers have interests.
The developer has interests.
The challenge is finding sufficient alignment to allow the project to move forward while protecting the commercial fundamentals.
That is Getting to Yes applied to the messy reality of business.
Family Businesses Make Negotiation More Complicated (Family Business Advisor)
Family businesses add another layer because commercial interests and emotional interests can become inseparable.
Imagine negotiating succession with three siblings.
One wants to run the business.
One wants to sell.
One wants dividends but does not work in the company.
Their parents want the business to remain in the family.
Now try separating:
ownership,
management,
fairness,
family history,
financial security,
recognition,
sibling rivalry,
legacy,
and parental expectations.
That is not simply a commercial negotiation.
It is a system of interests.
My Executive MBA dissertation focused on family-owned businesses and was subsequently developed into a book at the request of a government department.
One of the lessons I have taken from working with family enterprises is that people often argue about positions because their underlying interests have never been properly articulated.
This is where an independent Family Business Advisor or Chairman can add enormous value.
Preparation Matters More Than Negotiating Theatre (Fractional CEO Perth)
I have never believed that good negotiation is primarily about clever tricks.
Preparation is more important.
Before a significant negotiation, I want answers to questions such as:
What do we really want?
What must we have?
What would be nice to have?
What can we trade that costs us relatively little but may be valuable to them?
What are their likely interests?
What pressures are they facing?
What is our BATNA?
What is theirs?
What objective criteria support our position?
What information are we missing?
What are our walk-away conditions?
What happens if there is no agreement?
That preparation produces something negotiating tactics cannot.
Clarity.
And clarity becomes particularly valuable when emotions rise.
Silence Is One of the Most Underrated Negotiating Tools (Executive Leadership Perth)
Many people are uncomfortable with silence.
So they fill it.
They explain.
They justify.
They offer another concession.
They start negotiating against themselves.
I have learned that a thoughtful question followed by silence can be remarkably powerful.
Ask:
“Why is that important to you?”
Then stop talking.
The answer may tell you more about the negotiation than another ten minutes of arguing your own position.
Good negotiation requires listening for what has not yet been said.
Experience Helps, but It Can Also Make You Overconfident (Leadership Development Perth)
After decades in business, experience helps you recognise patterns quickly.
But experience has a downside.
You start thinking:
“I’ve seen this before.”
Perhaps you have.
Perhaps you haven’t.
That is why even experienced owners and executives benefit from independent challenge.
Good business advisory is not valuable because the adviser automatically knows more than the owner.
It is valuable because somebody outside the emotional centre of the negotiation may ask a question the people inside it have stopped asking.
Where Getting to Yes Is Not Enough (Business Advisor Perth)
No worthwhile book review should pretend the book is perfect.
Getting to Yes is extraordinarily useful, but its cooperative approach can be misunderstood.
Not every counterparty is seeking mutual gain.
Some negotiators use:
extreme anchors,
artificial deadlines,
information asymmetry,
threats,
delay,
bluffing,
emotional pressure,
and strategic ambiguity.
Some organisations simply possess vastly greater bargaining power.
Principled negotiation does not mean being naïve.
It does not mean being nice at any cost.
It does not mean trusting everyone.
It does not mean splitting the difference.
And it certainly does not mean agreeing.
The book itself addresses difficult tactics and bargaining power, while later negotiation scholarship has also refined aspects of BATNA and warned that an overly narrow focus on alternatives can obscure other sources of value and leverage.
The objective is therefore not:
Get to yes.
It is:
Get to the right yes.
And be sufficiently disciplined to say no when the proposed agreement is inferior to your alternatives.
What Other Negotiation Books Add to Getting to Yes (Leadership Development Perth)
Getting to Yes is foundational, but I would not regard it as the final word on negotiation.
William Ury’s later Getting Past No explores difficult counterparties and overcoming impasse.
Chris Voss’s Never Split the Difference brings a very different perspective from hostage negotiation and places greater emphasis on tactical empathy, calibrated questions and emotional dynamics.
Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro’s Beyond Reason explores the role emotions play in negotiation, including appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status and role. Harvard’s Program on Negotiation continues to draw on this work when discussing appreciation and emotional dynamics.
David Lax and James Sebenius’ 3-D Negotiation adds another insight I particularly like, sometimes the greatest opportunity is not improving your performance at the table, but changing the game before you get there.
That resonates strongly with my own experience.
Build alternatives.
Change the participants.
Change the sequence.
Change the scope.
Change the issues.
Change the structure.
Then negotiate.
A Practical Negotiation Framework for SME Owners & Leaders (Strategic Planning Perth)
Before your next significant negotiation, I suggest working through seven stages.
1. Define the Outcome (Strategic Planning Perth)
What are you actually trying to achieve?
Do not confuse the opening position with the desired outcome.
2. Understand the Interests (Business Advisor Perth)
What matters to you?
What appears to matter to them?
What have you not yet understood?
3. Prepare the Evidence (Governance & Boards)
Identify facts, benchmarks, valuations, market evidence, risks and objective criteria.
4. Create Alternatives (Business Growth Perth)
Do not enter with one rigid solution.
Develop several structures capable of satisfying the important interests.
5. Strengthen Your BATNA (Strategic Planning Perth)
Improve your alternatives before you become dependent on the agreement.
6. Negotiate the Problem (Leadership Development Perth)
Remain respectful towards the people while being rigorous about the commercial issues.
7. Decide Rationally (Fractional CEO Perth)
Compare the final agreement against your realistic alternatives.
If it is better, proceed.
If it is worse, walk away.
Practical Recommendations for SME Owners & Leaders (Business Advisor Perth)
Before your next important negotiation:
- Write down your underlying interests, not merely your demands.
- Identify what you believe the other party actually needs.
- Separate your preferred outcome from your minimum acceptable outcome.
- Identify and actively strengthen your BATNA.
- Estimate the other party’s BATNA.
- Identify objective criteria that could resolve areas of disagreement.
- Develop multiple possible packages rather than one proposal.
- Determine your walk-away point before emotion and sunk costs distort it.
- Avoid making concessions simply because you are uncomfortable with silence.
- Never assume price is the only variable.
- Document precisely what has been agreed.
- For material transactions, obtain appropriate legal, financial and commercial advice.
And perhaps most importantly:
Never become so emotionally committed to completing the negotiation that you stop asking whether you should.
Key Takeaways From Getting to Yes (Business Advisor Perth)
Negotiation is problem-solving, not combat.
Positions tell you what somebody demands. Interests help explain why.
Relationships and commercial issues should be managed separately.
Creating value can be more profitable than simply fighting over its division.
Objective criteria can replace opinion with disciplined analysis.
BATNA provides a benchmark against which the proposed deal can be assessed.
Negotiating power is often created before negotiations begin.
Preparation generally matters more than theatrical aggression.
Time already invested in a negotiation is not a reason to complete a bad transaction.
And sometimes the best negotiated outcome is:
No deal.
Frequently Asked Questions About Getting to Yes (Business Advisor Perth)
What Is Getting to Yes About? (Leadership Development Perth)
Getting to Yes presents the method of principled negotiation, which focuses on people, interests, options and objective criteria rather than relying principally on positional bargaining.
What Does BATNA Mean? (Strategic Planning Perth)
BATNA means Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement, essentially the best realistic course of action available if the current negotiation does not produce agreement.
Why Is BATNA Important to SME Owners? (Business Advisor Perth)
Because it provides a benchmark for deciding whether an agreement should be accepted and helps prevent owners from agreeing to poor terms merely because they feel they need the deal.
Is Price Usually the Most Important Part of a Negotiation? (Business Improvement Perth)
Not necessarily. Risk, payment terms, timing, control, warranties, security, flexibility, service levels, future obligations and numerous other variables may create or destroy more value than the headline price.
Does Getting to Yes Mean You Should Always Compromise? (Executive Leadership Perth)
No. Principled negotiation is not the same as splitting the difference. Sometimes objective analysis and a strong BATNA should lead you to reject the proposed agreement altogether.
Should SME Owners Read Getting to Yes? (Business Advisor Perth)
Yes. I regard it as one of the most practically useful books an SME owner or leader can read because its principles apply repeatedly across customers, suppliers, employees, shareholders, financiers, partnerships and major transactions.
Conclusion, Don’t Negotiate Merely to Win, Negotiate to Achieve the Right Outcome (Fractional CEO Perth)
Getting to Yes has endured because its central ideas are simple enough to remember but powerful enough to influence the way you approach consequential commercial decisions.
For SME owners and leaders, perhaps its greatest contribution is changing the questions.
Instead of:
How do I beat them?
Ask:
What are we actually trying to solve?
Instead of:
How do I make them concede?
Ask:
What interests are driving their position?
Instead of:
How do I get this deal done?
Ask:
Is this genuinely a good deal compared with my alternatives?
And instead of:
How much can I extract from the other side?
Ask:
Is there a way of creating an outcome that is more valuable to both of us?
Across almost four decades of corporate leadership, entrepreneurship, investment management, Boards, acquisitions, strategic alliances and advising businesses, the negotiations I regard most highly are not necessarily those where the other party surrendered the most.
They are the ones where there was clarity about what mattered, discipline about what could not be compromised, creativity about what could be changed and sufficient independence to walk away when the deal no longer made commercial sense.
My negotiations with GlobalCo taught me the importance of understanding strategic interests beyond the headline number.
Acquisition negotiations taught me that eighteen months invested in a transaction does not mean you should spend another dollar completing a bad one.
Kenton Eco Estate taught me that complex negotiations can involve multiple parties with dramatically different interests, and that successful implementation requires far more than simply defeating an opponent.
And studying strategic negotiation formally reinforced something experience has repeatedly confirmed:
Preparation gives you choices.
Choices reduce dependency.
Reduced dependency creates negotiating strength.
That, for me, is the enduring value of Getting to Yes.
But I would change the title slightly for the SME owner.
Do not negotiate merely to get to yes.
Negotiate intelligently enough to know which yes is worth having, and which yes should become a no.
For SME owners facing an important acquisition, business sale, shareholder issue, strategic partnership, supplier negotiation or other consequential commercial decision, an independent perspective can be particularly valuable before positions become entrenched. You can contact me to discuss your business if you would like to talk through the strategic and commercial issues surrounding a significant negotiation.
